a member of the studio audience.

and suddenly, michelle realized that maybe her fruit of the loom

granny panties* weren't so sexy after all.

the episode of cityline i attended last week (was that really just a week ago?) aired today ... i don't know how long they leave the video up for, but you can click here and watch me (in the black sweater with the gray scarf) as i try not to look at camera and attempt to keep my not-so-chic sneakers out of the shot.

*sorry, carol!

yeah, i don't know.

to be perfectly honest, i really don't know what happened yesterday morning ... it's all a blur that ended with me packing my office and crying in my car ... so it's hard for me to explain it to you.

i don't think it's as simple as when i left my last job ... that was all about the money, or lack there of ... it was unavoidable and predictable. but this time around, i feel like it's a bit more personal ... more about what i lack than what the budget lacks.

but, i left with promises of glowing references and affirmations that i am a fabulous and talented person ... just, apparently, not fabulous and talented enough.

anyway, between mood swings (i almost started crying while buying windshield washer fluid at zellers this afternoon), i am trying to remain positive ... assuring myself that something better is just around the corner ... but then i look at my bank account and i start to hyperventilate.

i really hate this. really. fucking. hate. it.

*sigh*.

i lost my job today.

merry christmas.

giant snowman attacks city.

someone grab a hairdryer!

catching up.

i just realized that i've been back from toronto for 4 days and we haven't chatted ... and it's not for lack of things to talk about.

so, i spent my last day in toronto pretty much as i expected (the september issue was fabulous, by the way!) ... and had a bumpy, but otherwise uneventful, trip home. the break itself was a great idea ... i have been feeling much less wound-up since i got home.

i didn't really take many pictures while i was away, but you can see the ones i did take here.

i was back to work on thursday ... i had a full day meeting to attend, but during a break learned that my supervisor is moving on to another position. this makes me sad because she is so great to work with and, if we had the chance to actually look up from our workloads, i could have learned so much from her ... but it is a great opportunity, and i know that she didn't come to the decision easily.

change happens ... i don't have to like it, but it happens.

friday night we had a little party for some volunteers ... yesterday i had to make a trip to eastern passage (which is not really that far, but once again my aversion to bridges makes my life a bit more annoying than it has to be) for work ... last night we had snow, and this morning i woke up to no power.

oh, and a repeat of this ... at 7:30am, but only for 45 minutes, thank god ... any longer than that and i would have needed another vacation!

11/09

project 365

sore feet and the city.

next time i come to toronto, i need to wear roller skates ... or shoes made of pillows ... because all i do is walk, and my feet huuurt! but it's totally worth it ... it's been a great couple of days in the big city.

yesterday was fun. i started the day at a taping of cityline ... which was very cool. i ended up in the front row, almost directly behind the host ... so if you are in a city that gets the show (sadly, we don't see it in halifax anymore), watch on tuesday, december 8th ... i'm the uncomfortable-looking girl in the black turtle neck sweater and grey scarf who shows up once in a while.

anyway ... it was their lingerie special, which was actually really interesting. and there were freebies!! lots of freebies!! i walked out with 3 pairs of fancy (ie. not fruit of the loom) underwear, some soap with which to wash the fancy underwear, bubble bath, and a starter troll bead bracelet.

after that, i did a little shopping ... wandered around for a while ... and then plopped myself into a movie theatre seat to watch an education. of the 10 of us who were in the theatre, i think i was the youngest by about 40 years ... but then again, i guess people my age are working at 2pm on a tuesday! i really enjoyed the movie ... and my feet enjoyed the break!

right now i'm just hanging out in my hotel room ... my flight home doesn't leave until 8pm, so i have another full day ahead of me ... i have a little bit more shopping to do (they drew our "not-so-secret santa" names at the office yesterday ... i need to pick something up for that ... and, yes, i have been checking my work email because i'm a freak with issues), some photos to take, and i'm planning on catching the 1:40pm showing of the september issue before i make my way to the airport.

vacation, had to get away.

and this post fulfills my commitment to nablopomo ... i can hardly believe it is november 30th already, but, jeez, posting every day was a real challenge this month.

i usually avoid the blog when i am feeling blue ... so, note to self, if i happen to be an ennui-filled stressed-out freak next november, step away from the nablopomo'ing.

but ... to end the month on a positive note ... i am in toronto and having a great time! my feet hurt and i'm pretty much exhausted, but i've also discovered the joy that is the starbucks peppermint mocha (twice!), am the proud owner of a knock-off tokidoki purse, saw shawn ashmore interviewed by my boyfriend george, and spent an extraordinary amount of time staring at and taking pictures of christmas lights (like the ones above) and ice skaters in nathan phillips square.

this vacation was a very good idea.

feeling festive.

i put up my christmas tree this afternoon ... elf is on television tonight ... and in just over 12 hours i will be on my way to toronto. i'm feeling festive today.