say what?

i just applied for a fundraising job.

seriously.

i may need medication.

i have to admit, an issue that i am having with the new job is that my hard work and headaches are all to make other people rich. i realize that is the way that most of the world works, but this is the first time in my professional life (9 years ... holy shit) that i have worked in a for-profit environment ... and i am not altogether comfortable with it. i like having a cause ... a raison d'etre. the stress and insanity seems worth it somehow if it is going to make a difference to someone in the long run.